September 2008 Archives

these days, i spend a lot of time with my nose pressed up against my Excel spreadsheets, online account pages and personal finance websites. with the looming WORLDWIDE FINANCIAL MELTDOWN (Fox News-inspired hysteria implied), i've found myself increasingly glad i spent the earlier part of the summer straightening out and getting prepared for a new start with my own finances. while things are nowhere near flush, with a little careful planning and some cuts here and there, i've settled into a budget/plan which manages to cover almost any financial hiccough which is likely to strike me. other than a major upset (job loss, disability, car finally quits), i feel like it's all going to be okay -- which is a far sight better than i was feeling just six months ago.

i thought things were good last year, too; but then i crashed my car and things went downhill fast. i had to use up my "emergency fund" to buy a new car, then dip into the credit cards to pay for repairs to the new car (both planned and un). on top of that, i was still trying to maintain a social life consisting of many meals out (usually with drinks) and having people over (more Wii games and controllers!). then came christmas and birthdays and just trying to live "normally"... suddenly, i was stretching things to the limit trying to pay back the bank and the credit cards, while still buying food and gas for the car.

luckily for me, a long relationship with the bank (yes, RBC, the one i railed against because they wouldn't give me a free computer) proved worthwhile and i got myself into a consolidation loan with a payment and terms reasonable enough to not only manage my debt payments but also sock away over $400 every month for both yearly bills (insurance, memberships, etc) and padding for my new "emergency fund". i'm not at all happy my debt "end date" is now somewhere in 2013, but at least there is an end date. the more i read about people's personal finance problems (and i read a LOT), the more i feel i actually might have my shit together when it comes to money. i hope.

it wouldn't surprise me to learn that the recent rash of decluttering/cleaning/decorating i've been going though has been a direct result of this reorganization in my financial life. once one part of your life starts to get put in order, those which aren't so neat seem to demand the same attention. in order to free myself from the physical things which have been weighing down my psyche, i've had to also let go of a lot of emotional things attached to them. it's been very challenging, especially to someone such as myself who is prone to some serious emotional packrating. every little nick-knack or card or book or chair has some huge emotional attachment which needs to be separated from the item while i remind myself that i don't need the THING to hold onto the MEMORY. heck, even some of the memories have had to be let go of.

as i remove things from my life, i've discovered: stuff i didn't know i had, stuff which isn't even mine, too much stuff makes me anxious, giving things away makes me feel good and, i hate to say it, stuff i wish i had. as i go through my possessions, i'm discovering things i don't have, or which need replacing. so far, they're mostly kitchen items -- my tech desires are mostly fulfilled (except for that Canon 5D Mark II, of course) and, with the addition of the awesome chair, so are my desires for furniture. surprisingly, it kind of makes sense. as i've tried to cut back and be more frugal, specifically in the food/entertainment arena, new/better kitchen items could really come in handy. i keep finding myself wishing for a food processor so i could make my own hummus instead of paying $4.99 for it at Save-On, or a proper roasting pan big enough for a chicken/cow/turkey or a cast-iron frying pan to make anything from cornbread to a perfect steak.

kitchen anecdote: i had to throw out a spatula the other day. not only was the rubber bit separating from the wooden handle, the tip of it had mostly disintegrated from many years of use (i do love a good spatula!). not a bad lifespan for a 99¢ utensil; but, have you looked at the price of heat resistant spatulas lately? seriously, they range anywhere from $5 - $20 dollars depending on the store and brand. i was agog at the ridiculousness of such prices and loathe to even consider such an extravagance. i feel exactly the same way about replacing the square baking pan which has lost all it's anti-stick coating or the awesome pot with all the chips in its teflon.

it makes me wonder if i'm going a little too far in trying to get all the good use out of my tools. am i so cheap i can't even buy myself a new spatula?

i have many more thoughts on finance, frugality, marketing and our North American culture of stuff. maybe i'll even get around to sharing them with you. i hope i do, as i'd really love to start a conversation about it.

dammit, just as i was trying to get new message opened up in gmail so i could write down this awesome and witty idea i had for a post, i got bombarded by interruptions. what i'm left with is an unsatisfying creative itch i can't scratch. grr.

so, i'll just haircut blog about my mini-vacation instead:

- dropped car off at mechanic, ate butter chicken with boyfriend.
- took ferry to Nanaimo, paid $1.49 for a banana.
- drove to Victoria with mom, wasn't allowed to go to yard sales on the way.
- ate junk, watched tv, tried to entice cats to sit on my lap. repeat for three days.
- went shopping, bought new good jeans (as opposed to my new crappy jeans).
- drove to sooke, visited with the lovely Mrs. Nixon, petted Piper, ate fish'n'chips
- unsuccessfully stalked Jim, got chatted up by an 80 year old motor head.
- took ferry to Tswwassen, got picked up by Colene the awesome.
- slept in own bed (bliss), bathed with bubbles, picked up car, went to Walmart, ate a Fat Burger.

all in all, it was a very restful and relaxing five day vacation. i'm not big on the travelling part of travel, but i usually do enjoy myself once i've arrived.

it was a very close call, but for about an hour today there was a chance i wouldn't be able to go to victoria for my annual visit.

turns out that my boss made a typo in an email back in MARCH which meant that there had never been anyone booked to cover for my days off work next week. the thing is, i was prepping my desk for the days away and thought "i should check who's filling in next week" and asked HR. it's a good thing i did, otherwise, mr. supervisor would have been stuck with an empty desk for three days - and i would have had mountains of work and a frantic boss to return to. we're all lucky i'm so diligent, i guess.

in other news, i spent my morning at the dentist having my broken crown replaced with a temporary one, a cavity filled and my troublesome crown ground down in hopes of making it less painful. my dentist had to give me three needlesful of freezing, but i still felt half the procedure. you see, i'm sensitive to epinephrine, so i can't have the "normal" anesthetic, but the slower-acting, shorter-lasting kind. every time i would wince in pain because the freezing was coming out my poor dentist would get upset and reach for that big, scary needle. eep!

then, i was reminded of why i never make dentist appointments for the morning. the entire left side of my face was still frozen when i got into the office. then the freezing started to come out. ow. i thought it was bad when i was in the chair. nope. i spent most of the day suddenly grabbing my face as blinding pain shot through my teeth. fun!

at least now i have a new a tooth on order!

and, i'm on my way to my little mini-vacation first thing tomorrow. i can't wait! i get to hang out with my mom, two cats and i have a lunch date with the fabulous mrs. nixon! on top of all that awesome, colene rearranged her entire tuesday evening to drive all the way out to the ferry terminal to pick me up. how lucky am i to have such an generous friend? SO lucky!

y'all have yourselves a great weekend, y'hear! ;)

i've been thinking that i'm SO GLAD that i have a dentist appointment next week because maybe i'll be able to get the dentist to fix the crown he placed last year. i haven't been able to chew anything harder than Wonderbread on that new tooth without pain since its installation. that's on top of the random aches and sharp pains which trouble it.

i guess the universe was just waiting for something to kick my ass with for all the whining in the previous post because tonight, mere moments ago, my older, pain-free porcelain crown on the other side of my mouth came apart in my mouth after i bit into a piece of Dove dark chocolate (hell yes that will affect my review).

not that i needed anymore kicking with the upcoming hellacious car bill and the 2-hour bus ride from the ferry next week, but they say things come in threes, right?

gee, i wonder how the hell i'm going to chew things now. hm.

i'm smack dab in the middle of a major "woe is me" funk.

i feel the need to bitch and whine about all the things making me sad, crazy, angry and frustrated, but i know that if i even began to start to tell anyone i'd get blank stares or rolling eyes in return. so, what do i do? i put them on the internet where i don't have to see any "you've got to be kidding me" expressions.

- my car is acting like a little bitch and i am so very tired of being stressed out every time i get into it. no one knows what's wrong and, even if they did, i don't have any spare money to try to fix it. in the year i've had it i've spent as much on repairs, if not more, than i paid for it. yet, i have no other options. i can't afford another car and i have no desire to spend the winter commuting via public transit.

- my co-workers are pissing me off to an amazing degree. just because YOU can't remember a simple little thing *I* have to change the way i work? i don't think so. obviously they have no fucking idea how many "little things" i need to remember on a daily basis in order to do my job correctly; how many dozens of exceptions to every single thing i do i need to keep in mind as i go about my day. seriously?

- i want that fucking comfy chair out of my fucking apartment RIGHT NOW, goddammit!

- while money isn't nearly as much a stressor as it was just a couple months ago, things are still pretty tight and i'm tired of that. every possible expense, other than living expenses, is weighed cautiously to calculate it's merit before i spend. it's utterly exhausting.

- i really miss the jogging. i know it was only 60-90 seconds at at time, but after a while i was able to see marked improvement in how i performed and how i felt. i don't get as good a workout on the stationary bike, but it's the only thing i can do with my stupid wonky knee acting up again and again. it frustrates me because i just want to run!

- waiting for the MRI to start the trip down the knee surgery road is also bugging me. i can't really afford to go through the process until next year, but i would at least like to feel there's some progress. plus, even though it means there was someone messing about inside my body, i'm really looking forward to the 6-8 weeks off work for recovery.

- i want a shiny new cell phone like the one christopher just got. *pout*

- my new jeans keep slipping down my ass and i'm sick of yanking them up, but it's cheaper than having them altered and i hate wearing belts.

- i hate silverfish. and fruit flies.

- it'd be really nice if i could have a good night's sleep, too.

- trying to re-arrange my travel plans to victoria this weekend, eliminating the car (so i can leave it at the mechanic's to do the fixing i can't afford), is proving annoying. i have the going 95% sorted, but the returning is either going to cost a lot of money or take a lot of time -- neither of which i really want to have to deal with. grr.

a list of the cleaning/de-cluttering tasks i've undertaken in the last few weeks:

- consolidated four boxes of personal filing into one, highly organized plastic file storage box. there is a bag-full of shredding to do, but it's nice to know everything is in one place.
- went though my clothes closet, organizing by colour and clothing type. took a HUGE bag of clothes and plastic hangers to the Salvation Army. also, found at least ten items of clothing i'd totally forgot i owned. it was traumatic, but i definitely like the results. discovered most of my clothes are black.
- went through my collection of shoes. just as traumatic as purging clothing, but i managed to find seven pairs to take for donation. i could probably purge another three if i really wanted to, but you can't make me!
- sorted/organized my desk drawers. i have too many pens and pads of cute paper. it's a sickness.
- emptied, cleaned and organized the medicine cabinet in the bathroom. why i had so many sparkly hair accessories, i'll never know. discovered perfume is not like wine and does not get better with age.
- took keyboard apart and scrubbed each key clean of many years of crud. boyfriend was shocked at the state of it, which says a lot about how gross it was.
- sorted the piles of books stashed around the house. set about returning all borrowed tomes because if i haven't read them yet, i probably won't any time soon; and, i can always ask to borrow them when i'm ready to. have two books i don't know the owners of and four more belonging to people i don't talk to any more. oops.
- got ruthless with the various candle-holders and nick-nacks cluttering my shelves. piled them into a whole foods shopping bag and put them in the free stuff section of our building. they were gone within a few days. that's nice and satisfying.
- took all the knobs and dials off the stove top and scrubbed off the grime. seriously, i don't cook that much. how is it my stove can get that disgusting? ew.
- decided that owning six polaroid cameras is excessive, so found a new home for one, put another on ebay, am testing a third for keepability to replace the fourth. my two sx-70's are non-negotiable and will stay with me forever. by this time next week, i'll be at 50% polaroid capacity. sweet, less to dust!
- consolidated all my various stashes of (good) knitting supplies into the awesome red tote bag i got from Dove (post about that sometime soonish, i hope). the hope is that having it all in one handy place will encourage me to actually make progress on my yarn projects.
- after a shower from hades, a bathroom with water quite literally dripping off the ceiling prompted me to finally wash the walls as i've been threatening to for at least a year. you wouldn't think walls could get that dirty, but when the exhaust fan makes more noise than moves air, things can get a little swampy in the loo.

next up:

- attack the storage closet. no one needs that many gift bags or extra keyboards.
- get ruthless with the linens. i only have so much space and hardly ever have houseguests. i don't think i require so many blankets and throw pillows.
- socks? don't talk to me about the crap-load of socks i never wear any more. then there are the ones with all the holes i keep putting off replacing.
- find some way to deal with DVDs. there are quite a few and they're not very pretty, especially now that the living room is getting slicker with the recent chair exchange. there's got to be a good compromise between access and organization.
- the inside of the oven and fridge are gross and need serious attention. after having to clean six years worth of oven yuck when i moved from my last apartment, i promised myself i'd never let an oven go so long without cleaning. well, i've been in this place four years so far... oops.

gee, think i might have a problem? ;)