there’s a 70-foot crane outside my window right now. it’s getting awfully close as i type this. they’re doing something with the air-conditioning unit on the roof which is making the drop ceiling rattle something fierce.
as i watch the crane extend, rotate, lean in closer and hear the rattling get louder, closer, then stop all-together, i start to imagine catastrophy. what if the roof isn’t strong enough to support the equipment they’re moving about? i’m mentally preparing myself for a thousand-pound piece of machinery to come crashing down on my head. or what if the crane malfunctions and it comes through the window? would i be able to live with disfiguring scars?
this is how my mind works. if i die while sitting here at my desk, i think, someone will find my keys and go to my apartment to dispose of my possessions. what will they find in that apartment? a week’s worth of undone (but rinsed and stacked) dishes, a purple vibrator, cob-webs, a dirty shower, a shelf & a half of un- or half-read books, two boxes of craft supplies, 13 years of tax returns, two ounces of vanilla vodka in the freezer, a jar full of dum-dums, handcuffs & a choke-chain, five watches, an un-viewed copy of bambi, a large directory of pornography, seven half-empty bottles of shampoo, bowling shoes, dust, an un-made bed a video tape with yoga, half of felicity and meet my folks on it.
i really should do those dishes tonight. i’d hate for anyone to think i was a slob.

5 Thoughts on “dearly departed

  1. a large directory of pr0n? why you no share with friends? (this gramatically incorect post was brought to you by the letter “n”)

  2. it’s so hard to share porn. you never really know what other people’s tastes are like and it’s so easy to freak them out with yours.

  3. I started this thinking there was a 70-foot bird outside your window. I was more frightened for you then!

  4. col on July 24, 2002 at 12:32 said:

    lol you’re worried about what people would think about the dirty dishes? hehe, what about the handcuffs and choke chain?

  5. I am confident that whatever your taste in porn, I would share it (or at least look at it a few times with an open mind). So give it up, sexy! ;-)

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