yeah, me too.
i received this email from my mom this morning:
As you know walter has not been well and did not poop for several days as well as not eating, but this morning he presented me with a pile of shit in the middle of the bed!
I was so relieved I told him he is a good boy!!
just so you know, walter is the cat.
yeah, i got nothing.
why is it that when faced with adversity women start to cry but men want to hit something?
seems chewing is going to be an effort for a while. i can’t bite down on anything on the side which got worked on without shooting pains in my jaw. pisses me off considering that was my chewing side! now everything is masticated on the wrong side and i feel like a chipmunk with mumps while eating. attractive!
i’m painted myself into a homework corner once again this week. two days to do two week’s worth of work. why the hell do i do this to myself? i must really like the adrenaline.
what’s with “zero dollars” instead of “free” or “cash back” instead of “discount”? i fucking hate advertisers. almost as much as i hate the fact that society, in an effort to keep itself safe from litigation, is curtailing people’s opportunities to make the wrong decision. i don’t want to be so protected from doing something wrong, dangerous or stupid that i lose all ability to use common sense. then again, common sense is a rare commodity these days, it appears.
stop breeding common sense out of the human race, dammit. i’m sick of my freedoms being curtailed because you’re a fucking idiot.
guess who got to be a passenger in her dream car today? yes, me. me! i knew i’d love the volkswagen golf, but i hadn’t actually been inside one until now. it’s pretty much everything i thought it would be. i just wish i knew how to drive stick so i could have actually driven it a wee bit. i can only imagine it’s even more drool-inspiring when you’re behind the wheel. ahh, just what i needed… more incentive to get debt-free to afford getting into debt again.
my tongue is huge and there’s a foul taste in my mouth.
no, it’s not ebola. i’ve just returned from the dentist where my last two mercury amalgam fillings were replaced with the white fillings of indeterminate substance. whee! my teeth are all white again! no silver in my mouth, baby.
now if i would only stop drooling on myself…
p.s. you don’t ever want your dentist to say “oh… this is going to take longer than i expected” after he’s started working on your teeth.
p.p.s. i found out what the silver things he stuffed down into my gums were. no wonder i’m still in pain.
Cancer (June 21-July 22)
When will your swirling urges for adventure boil over, Cancerian? When will it become impossible for you to keep ignoring the call of illuminating temptations and exotic sanctuaries? When will you finally give in to your longing to escape and wander? The astrological omens suggest the turning point will come soon. They say that in the frontiers of your imagination, the vision of a brave quest is already simmering. Where will the mysterious awakening lead you? To the ends of the earth? To the secret heart of a familiar stranger? To the gritty depths of your dreams of the future?
[thank you jodi chromey]
i ran out of peanut butter, so i’m eating chicken fried rice for breakfast.
okay, listen up. yes, you!
effective immediately, everyone on my people list must upgrade their sites to look pleasing in netscape 7 so i can switch my main browser. that means watch your css positioning so that the columns don’t overlap and, for god’s sake, don’t let it scroll horizontally!
we now return you to your regularily scheduled day. thank you.
– i bet you didn’t know i had an about page i update infrequently with current trivia about myself.
– i’m also fairly certain few of you ever visit the webcam (which is updated even less frequently).
– then there is the now-defunct guestbook no one ever signed (except col), so i turfed it.
– i’ve added a new item to my store.
– my wishlist has been converted to the canadian store to make the gifts you buy me arrive sooner (and save yankees money), but i’ve retained the amerikun version for a few items which aren’t available up north.
– did you know you can search my archives to see if i’ve talked about you?
– i’ve started collecting the pictures i post during the month into galleries, too.
– it’s mostly a joke, but if you want you can give me five bucks.
“you wouldn’t worry about what people thought of you if you knew how little they did.”
i’m over it.
i can’t even begin to describe how extraordinarily alone i feel right now.
i like my instructor more with every class. i just wish the network hadn’t been down today. that sucked a lot. at least i’d had the foresight to print out this week’s notes. i’m not pleased about being unable to start the homework until it’s put online, though. i guess i’ll just have to watch the dvds i rented today.
yay dvds!
dad phoned while i was at school leaving a message about a superbowl party at the step-uncle’s tomorrow. if i hadn’t blown off this morning doing dick all, i might have taken him up on it. as it is, i’m already tentatively booked to go out with m&m, but who the hell knows what’s going on with them lately. i still don’t even know if we’re playing tonight after last week’s kafuffle. men are dumb. especially when combined with beer. remember that. it may prove useful in your future dealings with the creatures.
so yeah, dvds. i rented quills and some german flick called advertising rules! (with the exclamation point). if you care, i might let you know how i liked them. but, really, i don’t know why people even bother reviewing films. they’re far too subjective a medium to rely upon someone else’s (especially a stranger’s) interpretation. but if you really want me to, i’ll share my impressions.
oh yes. i will share.
i’m eating hallowe’en-sized aero bars and debating whether or not to find out if we’re doing anything tonight. i could stay home with my movies, popcorn and a pizza (dear god, how i’ve been craving pizza this week) and avoid drama altogether. i probably won’t. maybe i won’t. i just really have no idea if i will or i won’t right now. i’ll let you know later. right now, i’m going to go play blasterball revolution. and finish these bits of chocolate. mm, chocolate.
busses and cars are like little sausages with wheels: outer casings filled with meat.
best. post. ever.
i should be doing homework, but instead i’m watching a dvd while awaiting the end of laundry and the start of the bachelorette… yes, this is the life of a single girl in the city. woot.