I love you.

“I didn’t want to talk to you tonight,” she muttered.
He closed his eyes and shook his head, “then why did you answer the phone? I know you have call display. You knew it was me. Why didn’t you just let it ring?”
“Since when have you known me to do anything logical? It was you on the phone, Mark. How could I not answer?”
Mark sighed carefully, he didn’t need her to hear his frustration. It would only make this harder than it already was. “Anyway… This can wait until tomorrow, Shan. You should go to bed or something. I know you haven’t been sleeping properly. You’re never yourself when you’re overtired.” His voice betrayed his deep concern for Shannon’s well-being. Even he was surprised at the amount of emotion he heard.
“I… can’t sleep,” Shannon mumbled into the receiver. It sounded like she was holding it between her chin and shoulder. Mark heard what sounded like a newspaper being folded or a pile of loose papers falling from desk-height. “Shit. Hold on.”
She dropped the phone with a loud clunk which made Mark wince uncomfortably. He could hear her swearing as she cleaned up whatever it was which had fallen. Eventually, she picked up the receiver again. Sounding slightly annoyed, she asked, “why did you call, Mark?”
That’s just like her, he thought, asking the tough questions straight out. Fuck pussy-footing around; she had chutzpah, and he loved her for it.
“I just wanted to talk,” he shrugged even though he knew she couldn’t see it. “We haven’t in a while.” Mark suddenly felt stupid for phoning her so late, especially on a work night. It was selfish of him, but he had been lying in bed and the urge to hear her voice was overwhelming. He had the phone in his hand and was dialing her number before he even realized it.
“Yeah,” she said, the weariness replacing the flash of anger he’d heard in her voice. “It has been a while. Talk to me while I get ready for bed? Not that I’ll sleep.”
This is not how it was supposed to go down, he thought frantically. How can I talk her to sleep when I want her to be excited and happy for me? Even though I know she won’t. How can I even consider telling her when I know what I have to tell her will probably push her off the edge she’s been on for the last few months? How can I tell her when…
“Of course,” he replied in an almost-whisper, his voice soft like velvet. “What do you want me to talk about?” This is how it had started, and this is how it would end… tonight.
Voices on the phone. Pictures via email. Christmas presents, birthday gifts, and care packages. They’d known each other for years, but they’d never met in person. It had just never worked out that way. It never would, not now.
He’d never said he loved her, even though it was plain to them both he did. He never said he missed her when they didn’t talk for extended periods. He never let anything slip which might convey even the smallest part of her importance in his life. If he said it all now, she’d know it was over. That she would never hear from him again. It would be so easy to just say “I love you” and have it done with.
“Shannon,” Mark breathed into the phone, “I love you.”