i made the long-brewing, yet weirdly rash, decision to give up social media for the month of February. no twitter, facebook, instagram or tiktok. it was getting too much – too much time, too much hate, too much angst, too much frustration. i wanted a reset and to just not feel fucking bad all the time.

at first, it felt pretty good. i had a SHOCKING amount of extra time. i mean, i knew my tiktok scrolling was getting bad, but yikes.

then, the kitten* did something cute and i couldn’t share it. after that, i finally got a photo of my pink hair which looked good and there wasn’t anywhere to post it. next, i found myself jonesing for some Elyse Myers stories, gregisms and wondering what was going on with Andrew’s rock saga.

so, now i’m here. writing on the blog i told y’all i was shutting down. THAT’S how desperate i am to scream into the void.

ugh. i feel dirty.

well, while i’m here…

***

i got married! we had to cancel the wedding we’d planned due to Covid, but Brad & I wanted to keep our date (5.10.20), so we had a socially-distanced, micro-wedding in a park with just us, our witnesses and officiant. the idea was we’d just bump the big wedding/reception to the fall when we could gather again… that was almost two years ago now and, well. we’re still married at least.

***

*as previously posted, Amy Pond passed away in November. i’m still utterly heartbroken with grief and am prone to full body-wracking sobs if i remember her dying in my arms. but, listening to the universe when she speaks, we now have new cat energy in our life in the form of Penguin, a (now) 9-month-old male kitten of the brown tabby persuasion.

i didn’t mean to, but one day found myself looking at adoptable cats online. when i saw his face, i immediately felt full Amy energy coming from him. i didn’t plan on applying – kittens were a hot commodity over the holidays and this guy was way too cute to not already have a list of applicants – but i did it anyway. i got a call back from the rescue less than an hour later. oops!

during my phone interview with them, they mentioned that they’d give my info to his foster mom – Amelia – to make contact. Amelia?! are you freaking kidding me? kismet.

long story spoiled: we went to meet him, fell in love and brought him home on xmas eve.

he’s a lot, but he’s absolutely delightful. Rose isn’t so sure about him, but we’re taking things slowly and eventually he’ll figure out that no means no and leave her alone when she’s done. we hope. right now, they’re not vicious to each other, but Rose sure SOUNDS like she’s being murdered by him whenever they scrabble. she’s a total drama queen.

it’s weird having a kitten who both snores AND farts, though.

***

i guess that’s it. thanks for listening, void.

One Thought on “when there’s no void to look back at you

  1. I had to give up TikTok for good because I found it was depressing the hell out of me. I love that the absence of social media brought you back to blogging, even if it’s only temporary.

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