it’s kind of a holiday tradition that i talk to my friend Tyler in a huge rush while he’s visiting his childhood home in Arizona. i guess when he’s away from the excitement of his high-falooting life in the city of angels he has more time to catch up with old (old, old, old) friends.
i don’t know why i’m mentioning it other than i really love it when we get to send more than one message to each other each week. part of me really misses the hours (and hours and hours and hours) we used to spend online chatting or talking on the phone into the wee hours of the night. the other part of me wonders what i could have done with all those hours (and hours and hours) if i’d been so inclined. hrm.
anyway, there’s no real point to any of this. just that i have a very large amount of affection for my friend Tyler and there aren’t even enough words to express how happy i am we are still in contact (however sporadic) and that after twelve years we finally got to meet and it must have went well because he keeps saying he wants to come back again (even though it hasn’t worked out that way yet).
btw, i ate about 18 timbits and drank approximately 1.5 litres of coffee for breakfast this morning. i don’t think i’ll ever make sense ever again.
p.s. today is my work birthday. 13 years! i’ve worked here as long as i was in the public school system. i should get a diploma! or at least a cake. where’s my cake?!

my dad came over tonight and did all the hammer and nailing to build the foundation of my awesome cat furniture. it would have been completed, except that the staples he bought didn’t fit his staplegun, so sisal and carpet will have to wait for a proper reload.
there’s supposed to be snow tomorrow. i’m not happy about it. i’m a little scared to take the new car out in the snow for the first time. i just have to keep remembering i have replacement insurance, so if it goes smash, i get a new car. hopefully in celestial blue this time.

last night, i came home to a wad of grungy hair on the bathroom floor. seems my cats are clean freaks, too, and were very helpful by cleaning out the shower drain. i guess i’ll keep them if they’re insisting on being so handy around the house.
now, if only i could get them to learn how to wipe their feet before leaving the Booda Dome.
i’ve vacuumed my floors more in the last three weeks than i have in the last three years. why didn’t anyone tell me cats are so damn hairy? it’s taking a lot of self-control to not freak out about the fur and paper balls and bits of kitty litter and pieces of food all over my apartment now. but, my neat-freak impulses run deep, so i’ve ordered myself a Furminator off Amazon. it won’t be here until after the holidays (probably), but after discovering my duvet is already covered in cat, something had to be done. i don’t know if it will work, but it was a third of the price at the local pet stores, so i thought i’d give it a shot.
my search for the perfect cat furniture has turned into Project: Make a Thing. with the help of my dad, the kittens should have their own custom scratch-perch by the end of the week. i hope it turns out as awesome as i’ve imagined it; but, whatever. the price is turning out to be just right: practically free! i think the only thing i’ll have to pay for is the sisal rope for the scratching pillar. yay for handy dads and access to power tools and wood scraps!
p.s. i pulled out the little heater and turned it on full blast last night for over three hours and it only raised the temperature in the living room three degrees. ugh. i’ll be glad when this cold snap snaps back outta here. *brr*

seems i suck at weekend blogging. sorry. i was too busy:
a) being cold
b) playing with cats
c) sleeping
d) freezing
e) being with awesome peoples
f) having hot showers in order to not freeze to death
g) eating amazing cheesecake
h) going to bed in order to combat both full moon malaise and the brr-cold
to blog about the goings on, of which, see the list above.
there are a lot of things i love about my apartment. of the less than five things i hate, the biggest has got to be that i don’t control the heat. it’s central to the building and has some magic setting that makes absolutely no sense and takes three to five days to react to whatever the outside temperature is. as a result, when winter SLAMS into town, my home is like a frozen winterland of shivering.
friday night, after dinner, dishes and chores were done, i was sitting on the couch with my kittens watching tv and i started to shiver so violently i got a headache. in order to combat the cold, i got in a blazing hot shower. so hot, i got a little woozy. it was blissful and burny and so very nice to be able to feel the searing in my fingertips. afterwards, i wrapped up in my towel, housecoat and buried myself under the duvet in bed in hopes of thwarting a return of the chill.
next i knew, it was 10:30 pm and i had no desire to wake up. ever. i hopped up and groggily turned off the lights, scooped the litter and went back to bed where it was warm and there were cats.
that kind of set the tone for the rest of the weekend.
other than some awesome potluck movie-time at Kimli’s saturday night and brunch & Main St. adventures with Colene & Christopher on sunday, there wasn’t a lot going on. except the mahjong. so. much. mahjong. seriously. i had tiles floating in my head as i fell asleep last night (after not getting dinner in time enough to fend off a grumpy low blood sugar headache and the chill set in so i, again, ended up in bed at 7:30pm just to keep the bad at bay).
anyway, rambly but cold. that’s what you get today. hi!

this was going to be comment on Jen’s post about the role of “emergency accounts” in her financial plan, but it got a little long as i realized i had a lot to say on the matter.
thanks to no-fee accounts offered by both my brick-and-mortar and online-only banks, i have a lot of different accounts set up to help me segregate and manage my limited income:
emergency fund – unexpected everything, major car bills, loss of income (sick, strike). this account used to be non-existent. i spent everything, and more, that i made and spent a lot of time shuffling money between credit cards. then, i somehow got my shit together and realized i needed a cushion to get me through unexpected rough patches. three years ago, i used the contents of it to buy the Golf from hell after i crashed my Geo. i heart this account so much. it currently has more in it than it ever has and just knowing it’s there to keep me from financial ruin is worth every penny.
car/gas fund – a fixed amount goes in every month, gas bills get paid out of it and the difference builds for regular maintenance (which, thanks to having a brand new car, should be very inexpensive for the next few years). the long-term goal is to increase the monthly amount over time so that when it’s time to trade in my car, there will be enough to help subsidize the purchase price of a new one.
yearlies fund – i added up all my once-a-year bills then divided the amount by twelve. that amount, plus a little more, goes in this account each month to cover things like car insurance, tenant insurance, flickr account fee, medical deductible, BCAA membership, domain hosting, etc. you know, those budget-busting bills you usually forget about until they’re way too close to the due date. hell, i even save for my twice-a-year haircuts and dental cleanings in this account!
cat fund – after a discussion about pet insurance vs. savings account on twitter, i decided to go the savings account route, especially after adopting two cats and research showed that there are huge disparities between premiums and coverage between pet insurers. unfortunately, i had to dip into the emergency fund to pay for Rose’s paw x-rays because i hadn’t yet made a deposit into this account. oops. maybe i made the wrong decision…?
frivolous/targeted fund – this is my “fun” account. the plan has been to put a set amount into this account so that when an opportunity arises that i can’t work into my monthly budget (and most don’t these days), i would have a small pool of money to use for it. say, a small trip or a sewing machine or cats — all of which i did this year, thanks to this account! unfortunately, whenever there’s an unexpected withdrawal from the emergency fund, this account gets shunned until it’s topped back up again.
i also have smaller ones for charity giving, christmas gifts and transitional savings (short term savings to cover monthly bills charged on credit cards to obtain rewards); but, the five above are my big ones. if i didn’t have them, i’d be in dire shape financially. i wouldn’t know what was coming or how to handle it when it did. i lived there for a long time and i will never, EVER go back. i may be crazy spreadsheet lady; but, i’d rather be that then stupid credit card girl.
i like talking about my money strategies. we should do it more often.

and just like that, most everything is right in the world.
or at least it doesn’t feel like everything is wrong, which is pretty close to all right.
when i arrived home yesterday i immediately took to my bed, whereupon i was joined by purring cats doing weird things to inappropriate parts of my body. this would have been joyful enough, but then i saw something. Rose was walking on her sore paw! i nearly lept out of my skin with excitement. keen observation revealed not 100% improvement, but nearly 75% of steps were taken with all four paws. healing achieved! no more worry about a lame kitten or kitty codeine doses. phew! i didn’t ruin my cat! yay!
just that would have been enough to help me out of my funk, but then Shan & Josh came over to meet the girls. we sat on the floor catching up and playing with kittens. we even watched ANTM and ate pizza! it was a fairly awesome way to fix a shitty day in hessieland.
except for that part when Josh tried to smuggle Amy home in his jacket. bad Josh! i can’t really blame him though, she is pretty adorable.
so, yeah. whiplash moodswings. ain’t i just a barrel of monkeys?

wow, i’m bloo.
i’ll blame my uterus today, but i’m fairly assured the overarching reasons are valid and as soul-crushing as they feel at this moment. i’m just not usually flooded with hormones and cramps enough to let them get to me this way.
i tried to explain to a co-worker my desire to void my life of all my stuff, only to build it back up in a more mindful manner. she didn’t get it. she kept saying things like “that would cost a lot of money” or “couldn’t you keep your nice couch? maybe put it in a different spot?” uh, no. that’s not really the point.
although, the point seems to be a bit of a moving target in my head right now.
as i type this, i want it all gone. all of it. bare walls, bare floors, empty shelves, empty closets, nothing but me sitting in the middle of my living room floor staring up at the rippled ceiling. then a coat of blisteringly white paint over everything. after that…
and it’s gone.
right now, i want to go to bed with a cat on either side of me and not come out unless there’s pizza or a sack of money enough to keep me in the manner to which i’ve become accustomed.
i wish i wasn’t smart. if i were stupid, maybe i wouldn’t realize i’m not living up to my potential and i wouldn’t be so damn disappointed in myself. maybe i’d be happy with my dreary day-to-day and unable to see that there could be so much more, of only i hadn’t done X, Y or Z in my past to limit my options today.
it’s times like these i really wish i liked to drink or do recreational drugs. it sometimes feels like an acceptable coping method. but, i don’t. and that makes me feel even more pathetic.
blah. just ignore me. that’s kind of what i want right now, anyway.

my head’s a jumble of thoughts today.
i’m suddenly overcome with STUFF. i want to give/sell/throw everything i own away and start over from scratch, being more particular and precise with what i bring into my home and life. i routinely get this urge, but right now, it’s entirely overwhelming. i really would just chuck it all and start fresh if i had the resources to do so. suffocating. that’s the sensation. it’s all just too much for me to handle right now.
me, the cats and some scrunched up pieces of paper is all we need, right?
so, if i start posting tweets about all the crap i want to sell, don’t be surprised. especially if it’s craft or seasonal stuff. you know, the shit which lives in boxes and never sees the light of day? oh, yeah. and all that bento box crap i bought and never used.
i got myself almost a full night’s sleep for the first time since bringing the kittens home. i didn’t wake up for anything until almost 4 a.m.! i don’t know if they were super-quiet or i just slept through all their antics, but i really needed the rest.
the time change is fucking with me so hard this year. well, i shouldn’t really blame the time change. i’m blaming the short amount of daylight. i get up, and it’s dark. i go to work, and it’s dark. i come home, and it’s dark. i go to bed, and it’s dark. i get home from work between 4:30 and 5:00; but, it feels like it’s 8 or 9 o’clock because it’s so damn dark out! even with every light in my apartment on, i have such a hard time accomplishing anything at home because it feels as if it’s almost bedtime and i should be winding down instead of doing something/anything. the irony is, all this dark is somehow making every day feel so much longer than it should, but i still can’t seem to get stuff done!
i can’t wait for spring.
oh, yeah. the cats found the toilet paper yesterday. luckily, they just pulled it all off the roll and didn’t do too much shredding of it. i certainly hope it doesn’t become a habit. that stuff’s not cheap!
i might have to go out at lunch. there’s actual daylight out there today. who knows when we’ll get to see it again.
wah.

i was too busy making spaghetti sauce, playing with cats and socializing to post on sunday.
instead you get this back-dated excuse.

the good news is that Rose does not have any discernible fracture in her paw. no orthopedic surgery or splints necessary.
the bad news is that it’s just a matter of waiting out the healing process by trying to keep a kitten calm. and give her oral medication for the pain. twice a day. when she’s egged on by her twin sister.
it’s going to be a long couple of weeks.
Rose still won’t weight bear on her right front paw, but she is using it in play (and attacks) as you can see in this video:

she’s hopping around the apartment on three legs, but doesn’t seem worse for wear. i’ve started calling her “hoppy” , “hobble” and “tripod”. but only with the utmost affection, of course. ;)
i can’t tell you the amount of relief that washed over me when i got the phone call telling me she was ready to come home. so happy. Christopher actually made me sit down and relax before he’d let me get in the car to go fetch her.
the vet said that she’s somewhere between 6 and 8 months old based on her size, weight and the length of her teeth. AND she & her sister were on Shaw TV’s The Animal Show tonight according to a text message i got from my co-worker. i’m totally going to see if i can find a copy of the segment on their site (unfortunately, since i switched to Telus TV, i no longer get that channel).
here! i found a screenshot!

my girls are famous! and not just on my website! btw, that’s Amy at the back and Rose up front. yay! celebri-kitties!

last night, as i was doing the dishes before i went to bed (since the cats came, i can’t leave anything in the sink for a period of more than 37 seconds because the cats, specifically Amy, can’t stay out of the sink — bathroom or kitchen). Rose, who has heretofore been the least offender of this practice was contradicting herself and trying to jump up during the wash cycle. unfortunately, instead of jumping on the clear side to my left, she was going for the occupied one to my right. you know, where the drying rack was, with all the dishes on it.
next thing i know, cat, dishes and dish rack are sliding off the counter and i’m grasping feebly to keep them all from going SMASH.
but smash, they did.
my glass teapot shattered, my wooden ikea dish rack broke, the plate, mug and plastic cup survived and Rose had taken off in fear.
i immediately grabbed Amy, put her in the bathroom and closed the door. after finding Rose huddled between the couch and curtains, i did the same to her so i could go back and clean up all the dangerous slivers, shards and chunks of teapot all over the floor.
about half an hour later, i was satisfied it was cat safe enough for me to let the beasties out of the bathroom. Amy was on the counter, of course; but, Rose was lying down on the rug in front of the litter box. i picked her up and immediately realized something was wrong. she wouldn’t weight bear on her right front paw at all. i gave her leg some probing squeezes all down its length, until i got to her paw. she wouldn’t even let me touch it. and it was starting to get swollen.
i freaked out. maybe not externally, but inside i thought i might lose it entirely.
i couldn’t think of a single place i could put her where she wouldn’t have to jump or walk far for anything, so i put her into her carrier with a towel and ramekins of food and water. after i was satisfied she was safe for the time being, i started to freak out externally.
i called christopher and started bawling. i just didn’t know what to do. he offered to make the hour-long transit trip over here and i took him up on it. while i waited for him to arrive, i sat in front of the carrier and cried and apologized and sang and talked to Rose. Amy either didn’t know or didn’t like what was going on and kept jumping on and around the box and swatting at my head. i didn’t blame her one bit. i felt like i’d broken her sister and she hadn’t even lived here for a week, yet!
after chris arrived and i cried some more, we decided to leave her in the carrier overnight and hopefully, by the morning, the swelling would go down and she would be fine. otherwise, we’d take her to the vet which was open first.
i didn’t think i’d get any sleep, what with the worry and the sinuses inflamed and stuffed with crying. i put in my earplugs, instructed chris to wake me for any scary noises, and managed to get a few hours of rest. when i got up this morning, her paw was just as, if not more, swollen and she wouldn’t put any weight on it at all. after carrying her to the litter so she could do her thing after being couped up all night, i gave her a little fresh food and water and then we drove to the vet.
i should have thought, but because i didn’t call first, they sent us packing with an appointment five hours later. luckily for my nerves, we got in for a cancellation two hours earlier. she’s at the vet now awaiting sedation and x-rays to determine what’s going on. i guess the best case scenario right now is that it’s either just a very bad sprain or a small fracture in one of her tiny wrist bones and she’ll have a very boring two-to-three weeks in a splint. the vet mentioned scary things like orthopedic surgery, nerve damage and problems in later life, but until they get images, i’m trying not to think about that too much. i’m barely holding back the tears as it is.
i feel like the worst kitten-mother ever. seriously. none of my other cats has ever broken themselves in my care! they’ve only been here six days and i’m already taking her to the vet to treat an injury? what the fuck kind of shitty caregiver am i to let that happen to a poor kitten? i feel like the shelter is going to swoop in and take her and Amy away because obviously i entirely fail at cats.
while i feel that, i know it was just an accident. shit happens. kittens fall down a lot. this was just dumb luck and unfortunate circumstance. but, now i think i know what it’s like to be a mother. all i can think about is that she’s hurting and i can’t do anything about it other than what i’m doing. i’m getting her looked after, damn the expense, and hopefully, everything will work out okay in the end.
i hope.
please, let it work out.

– i cried like a baby watching remembrance day services.
– i bought iron and slippers.
– my friend karen came over to meet the girls
– i ate pizza
– i watched two fairly not great movies
– i forgot to post yesterday in all the “hey! i have a four-day weekend!” excitement
tomorrow, massive shopping once i get paid and then some chores and junk. afterwards, i can relax with two! more! days! off!
awesome.

jamie came over last night and we had a good, long catch-up, fried fish and dumbfounded viewing of Canada’s Worst Driver. it was fun times. the kittens were well-behaved – except for the leaping atop the table as we tried to eat our dinner. and, because he loves me best of all, he even gave me a gift card for a local pet store as a cat-warming present. how sweet is he? SO SWEET!
speaking of warm cats, i was thinking today that i might set up a heating pad for them while i’m away at work on cold days. my place is notorious for being never the right temperature and i’m worried that, as on a day like today, they’ll get too cold and freeze to death. frozen kitties are not cuddly nor playful. kittens must be kept warm. and, maybe i’ll leave a light on for them. and possibly the radio set to a nice soft rock station. one with lots of celine dion and barry manilow.
yeah, i’m obsessed. i looked down at their adorable little faces this morning and wondered why it took me so fucking long to get a cat. they’re so awesome. even when they’re not, they’re the best thing ever. soft, vibrating balls of sharp and love!
hey, do you know of anybody who doesn’t like Mad Men? i know, right? it’s the best TV ever. only crazy people don’t understand its brilliance. right, jamie? ;)
teehee!

i will not write about cats. i will not write about cats. i will not write about cats.
so, um, how’s the time change treating you?
what about them bc lions, huh?
uh… OMG, I MISS MY CATS SO MUCH!
dammit.
i finally watched Inception yesterday. i’m not sure why so many people i know either walked out of the theatre or turned it off partway. seriously, at the very least, i’d think they’d be curious to see what the fuck it was all about in the end. SPOILER ALERT: not that they would have gotten that satisfaction! i’m glad i saw it, but it wasn’t as mind-blowing as all that. i kept thinking “Total Recall” and looking for hookers with three boobs.
otherwise, yesterday was the longest day in the history of time. by noon, i was sure it should have been eight p.m. i’m not really complaining. i got a lot of time to play with cats and break out the 50mm lens to take detailed photos of their noses while they were sleeping. colene came over to visit them and ended up staying for indian food and the last 45-minutes of the aforementioned movie. kimli & ed also dropped by and gave me a solid thumbs-up on my choice of felines — they have three cats, so i respect their approval.
jamie’s coming over tonight for cats & Canada’s Worst Driver. meghan & mark are coming over tomorrow night. karen’s going to meet them on thursday afternoon. i think i might lock the door behind her and not let anyone else in. or, maybe i should charge admission! the wee beasties cost me a pretty penny. maybe i could recoup some of my start-up costs!
okay, that’s enough words for today. i’ve got twenty-two more days to go and i don’t want to blow my wad.
happy three-day week!

content? right! content!
look! bath cat!

bath cat

sorry, t’was wayyy too busy playing with cats. there will be more words tomorrow.

i picked up my kittens today.

in case you missed the announcement, i’ve re-named them Rose & Amy. why? because they’re my companions, of course*.

they’re pretty much awesome. totally chill and taking their new surroundings in stride. Amy’s the curious shit-disturber and Rose is the overtly affectionate one. Amy’s the smaller, greyer one and Rose is the bigger, browner one. i’ve got colour coded collars on them for the time being. i don’t know if they’re permanent, but for the time being they’re proving very handy.

here’s a couple adorable videos to enjoy until i get some quality photos of them:


(* Rose Tyler and Amy Pond were companions of Doctor Who, for those who don’t get the reference. yeah, i’m a dork.)

i have a feeling i’m going to find myself very popular over the next couple of weeks. the hoards are gathering at the gates awaiting the impending arrival of the dread twins of tabby. gillian has threatened to show up at midnight saturday night/sunday morning — further confused by the time change taking place tomorrow — but, i know it’s an empty threat as transit options from marpole are sketchy at best at that time of night.

otherwise, i’m all cat-prepped. i hope.

i’m actually a little scared and intimidated. this cat procurement has been vastly different from all my others. my first cat was picked, named and brought home by my mom. my next cat adopted me after my third and last budgie flew out a window. the third cat showed up one day and just never left. my last cat was a be-ribboned gift from my boss’ son three days after my first cat passed away. these cats? i’ve been waiting for these cats for twelve years. that’s a long-ass time by anyone’s standards.

ever since i moved out on my own, i’ve wanted a cat. in my first apartment, it was verboten by the german landlords. in this apartment, it was technically not allowed, even though it seemed that everyone else in the building had one. but, being as i am, i didn’t want to risk detection and eviction by sneaking one in without permission. then there were the screens to ensure kitty didn’t decide that the second floor was a perfectly jump-able height to go after Little Black Squirrel or friendly neighbour cat. plus, i have this really nice red leather couch i wouldn’t much enjoy watching get shredded.

but, as shan keeps telling me: i need a cat. every time i visit friends with cats, i get a little jealous and a little sad. i know it’s a big, double-decade commitment, but there’s just so much good that comes from making yourself into the devoted slave of a feline. and i can’t wait for our adventure to begin!

i just really hope they leave my couch alone.

grr, argh!
if it hadn’t been for a concerned email from Jamie, i would have thought all my friends had deserted me. turns out my crappyass cms — Movable Type 4.23 — which lets all the spammers in the world comment on my posts, was marking all of your helpful and appreciated cat name comments as spam. so very frustrating!
even after finding this out, approving y’all, marking you as trusted and sending more real spam to hell, it was still quarantining valid comments while posting bogus ones. FUCK!
i knew the spam situation would be the crappiest part of my participating nablopomo, but i thought it was just because of all the extra bad comments i’d receive, not having to constantly monitor to ensure that my lovely readers’ words of wisdom were being erroneously trashed.
please be assured that if your comment does not appear, i will find it and set it free. many heartfelt apologies go to Jamie and Jim, my most frequently shunned commenters. i’m so sorry if you felt unloved. it’s not me, it’s the fucking program. grr.

i’m a kitty mama!
i waited all day yesterday for a phone call. i kept checking my answering machine remotely, wishing for a message. i rushed home and watched the clock anxiously until 5pm, when the shelter closed, only to feel sad and resigned myself to wait another day. then, at about 5:55pm, when the phone rang and the on-tv-screen caller id revealed it was the shelter, i answered, bracing myself for bad news.
it was a long and information packed phone call which not once contained concrete statements of acceptance until the very end. it gave me a stress headache, actually. but, the end result is worth it. i get to pick up my new kitties on saturday morning! i could have fetched them sooner, but i think this will work out best as then we’ll have the whole weekend to get them settled and used to our new life together.
OMG KITTIES!!!!11111ONE
so, now that i’m bringing these tiny balls of fluffy claws into my life, i need to give them new names. seriously, there’s no way i’m going to own cats named Tuti & Fruity. how awful! that’s where you guys come in. i have a (very) long list of possible names and i need help whiddling it down. i’ve a few favourites in the bunch, but i’d really like to solicit some popular opinion on the matter. to that end, here’s my list:

huff & puff mish/mash
frick & frack charlotte & emily
peaches & pixie salt’n’pepa
kate & allie thelma & louise
rose & amy betty & wilma
ginger & mary-ann laverne & shirley
buffy & willow wendy & tinkerbell
lucy & ethel betty & veronica
romi & michelle tigger & pooh
mouse & bird meatball & dumpling
sugar & spice sushi & pho
bubble & pearl whiskers & kitten
geek & nerd php & perl
canon & nikon aperture & shutter
flickr & twitter mac & pc
tivo & boxee peachy & keen
peach & rosalina tiny & teeny
grey & brown saffron & violet
dilly & pickle boo & squeak
peas & carrots sudo & grep

please leave your top two name pairs in the comments. i can’t guarantee i’ll use any of your picks, but i think they’ll help steer me in the right direction.
yay! hurry up, caturday!